The Space I Occupy

I want to be
Something other than what I am
What does it mean
To be human?
To wake up
And find that you would rather have continued
Sleeping
Is only an illusion
Is only an extension of
Waking life

Breathing deeper than usual
Pulling the cold air deep within my lungs
until there is no space between
You and I
Find something more than
Sleep
More than
Myself
And all the world I know

I wish you were here
Not with me
But here
Where I am
In this point
In space
In time
I would trade all I have
To see you
As you
For you to see me
As me

And with a great sigh
The muscles contract
Their contents
Expelled
As clouds of vapor
Fill the air
The light
Breaking apart and spilling out in all directions
Shadows filling the space between
Time more apparent
Than most days
Most hours
The little minutes between meetings
Or phone calls
Or empty small talk in the long hours of the day

I have faith
That there is a sun shining on my face
The warmth alone is not proof
Nor the light filling through my pupils
And falling
Tirelessly
Effortlessly
Indiscriminately
Against
The space that I occupy